You are sitting in a restaurant having dinner with your family. You see a couple walk in together. They come in together and are seated close enough to you that you can see facial expressions and hear them laugh, but not so close that you can hear what they say. Throughout the meal the couple is deep in conversation and it is apparent that he really cares for her, and she seems to really admire him.
You recognize the woman. She’s on the worship team at your church. You don’t attend a large church, so everyone knows everyone. You know she’s married. But not to this guy!
You continue to watch, getting rather curious. At one point you notice she has tears running down her cheeks and he seems to be talking very gently to her. But in a few minutes they are laughing and smiling again and she gives him a friendly punch in the arm as they get up to leave the table. He pays for the meal and leaves a tip under his plate. She doesn’t even attempt to pay for her own food.
***** Scroll down to the comments right now – don’t read any further – and tell me… what would you do? What are you thinking at this point? As a member of her church what is your responsibility? DO NOT read any further until you let me know what you are thinking!*****
They walk out of the restaurant. He opens the door so she can go out. She’s zipping up her sweater as she heads out. There’s a brief moment when you can’t see them. Then they end up just outside the window from where you are sitting. If you shift slightly to the left you can see them standing on the sidewalk. She’s pulled her hood up – apparently to keep the wind off her neck or from messing her hair. They stand and talk for a few minutes and then…
Oh my! He’s wrapping his arms around her in a big bear-hug sort of hug. Gives her a good squeeze, hangs on for a second or two, then lets go. He takes a few steps backward, waves at her then they both turn to go their own ways. He gets into a black Mercedes a few cars down, and she hops into the familiar Chevy she drives to church every Sunday. She sits in her car for a while, letting it run. You notice, as he pulls out from the curb and drives past, that they wave at each other.
You turn back to your fried chicken and French fries. Hmmm…. What happened there? Your mind has all kinds of things rolling through it.
- What does this look like to you?
- Do you have any responsibility here?
- What about the woman – do you think she owes you an explanation?
- What about if she wasn’t married? Would you think any differently? What if she was a single female leader in your youth group, would that be any different?
Next week I’ll give you a twist on this and show you a controversial verse from Scripture that comes into play in situations like this. In the meantime… answer a few questions and let me know what you think!